Anna & Sophia

I found this picture on the computer desktop.  It seem so peaceful and quiet.  I could imagine there’s nothing but the sound of the waves.  Don’t we all wish we have that calmness inside us.  Why is there anger.  Why couldn’t we just have happiness and joy in our life.  Do we all have to go through our ups and down to really appreciate the goods in our life.

I do not know what my future holds from now on.  But i could say.  I really appreciate Sophia more than ever in my life.  She is truly the stars and the moon.  She is the diamond in my eyes.  She could make me smile with the sprinkle in her eyes.  She is the only reason why i’m wake up everyday.  To still want to live and be strong.  To be strong not for myself, but be strong so when she need me.  I will be her back bone and her rock.  She is my life. My everything.  She is my one and only.

My heart is aching.   Is unexplainable, unbearable pain.  It is a pain that i wish i did not have to endure.

My heart is broken into million little pieces.  I lost a friend, my best friend, my partner, the love of my life.  Someone i can truly say has gone with me through good and the bad.  Irreplaceable.  A person that i can never find who will truly loves me the way he did.

I always wish there was some miracle with the advance technology that a time machine would be invented.  Not to travel to the future, but going back in time.   To undo or change certain things.  Now i wish there is such thing more than ever.   To change things that was done.  Erase what i saw.  Erase what i felt.  And most importantly, erase what i experience.

My heart is broken.  I lost what is dearest to my heart.  Now i truly wish everything could turn back the way it used to be.  But there is no time machine and no pills to erase memory.  Therefore, my heart is broken. Million, trillion little pieces.

My sick little bunny.

The thing i fear the most has arrived.  First came the little cough here and there.  Then the runny noise then….quiet.  Quiet as in sitting still, no movement.  Just watching her show quietly.   I must mention that my daughter is like a energizer bunny.  It just keeps going and going.  Sophia is the type of little girl that do not wait for the world to come to her.  She do whatever she wishes and is jumpy throughout the entire day.  Beside nap time, i cannot think of a time that the house is quiet or she’s not moving around doing something.   She can’t even sit still watching T.V. let’s put it that way.

How i know she must be really sick is whenever she is really quiet.  It is usually very serious.  That is the bad part about school.  All the kids share everything and more.  Sophia had also picked up a really bad habit from other little kids.  Sucking her thumb.  She was never a thumb sucker.  I know for sure she learned that from other kids.  That is even easier for kids to get sick.

I understand that kids are going to get sick no matter how you try to protect them.  You can’t put them in a plastic ball.  But every mother knows that when your kids are sick.  You will not have a good night of sleep for at least a couple of days.  Not to mention since they are not feeling well.  They will be more crankier than ever.  I love my daughter to death.  But when she is bad…..either i’m going crazy or i feel like i’m going to jump off the roof.

But what else can a mother to do when their little energizer bunny is running low in battery.  All you could do is give them lots of love and patient.  Hope they recharge ASAP.

I think i’m going to let her stay home tomorrow.  Don’t want her to get other kids sick. Besides she could get more rest that way.  Now i just pray she will have a good night sleep. *Crossing my fingers*

Read the rest of this entry »

Happy Friday everyone.  I already know the forecast of the weather for this weekend in New York.  Rainy and Cloudy.  But i guess that wouldn’t really bother me since i’ll be in class.  But before i leave everyone here, i was checking out this site with really nice clothes.  Great price and nice clothes.  I’ll be ordering some stuff from them.  I’ll take some pictures once it gets here.  Meanwhile check out this site.  www.enlystyle.com

Read the rest of this entry »

I mention last night that Sophia didn’t want to go to bed.  And what happen to little girl who doesn’t listen to their mother.  Puffy eyes!! Ha!! Ha! She woke up this morning like she drank too much water at night.  Not to mention she was so tired and sleepy.  Only if…..if they know what we do for them are for their best interest.

Read the rest of this entry »

Maybe it is just me. I think i do most of Sophia’s clothes shopping at Target. The price are super reasonable. The material is good. Cute style for toddlers. Can’t ask for more right. Especially since Sophia goes to school now and makes a mess of her clothes. I don’t see the point of buying some really expensive clothes where i know it would be ruin within an hour in school. Dirty! No problem! Either throw it in the washer or threw it in the garbage if it doesn’t come off. I won’t feel the hole in my pocket.

I do like to dress up Sophia though. Since the weather is getting chillier. I went to Target with her yesterday to pick out some long sleeves. Of course with her approval. She won’t even let me leave it in the shopping cart if she doesn’t like it.

Read the rest of this entry »

Now i know the reason why as we grow older.  We don’t cry as much.  That’s because we did 80% of our crying when we were little kids.

So it was bedtime for Sophia tonight.  Same time everyday. 9:30 P.M.  Tonight she decided it wasn’t time for bed yet.  She refuse to let me brush her teeth.  ( But i forced it in anyway.) I carry her to her bed.  And what does she do best.  Scream and cry.  She persisted pretty long too.  Until Papa bear came in, grab her.  Brought her out, literally.   Outside the complex area.  I guess they went for a walk.  With some magic, she came back quiet.  Still not asleep yet.  But much easier,  i tucked her in and she fell asleep pretty fast.

My question is.  Does she scream and cry like that in school.  And if so, how long does it last and what do the teacher do about it.  I’m just curious.  Sophia’s temper has never been good.  But i don’t think it has gotten any better neither after attending school.  Shouldn’t school make her more discipline ?!

I am very happy with Sophia performance in school.  She is handling it very well.  Yesterday she walked to school without a sign of tear what so ever. She even said by to me when i was leaving.  Now i really feel like i could really… really relax.  At the same time i don’t plan to sit at home and bum around.   Plan on taking some weekend class to improve myself.  Very nerves and excited at the same time.  I haven’t been in any class for a really long time.   So i think i’m more nerves than excited.   Either way…..i decided to take advantage of the free time i have before class start and went window shopping.  Yes…i really meant window shopping.  Didn’t really see anything new since i went last week.  Came across these couple of nice outfit from Charlotte Russe.  I think the dress above is cute for my up coming wedding party.  But i shall wait and see if i see anything else.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’m still shopping for a winter coat.  I came by this jacket by Marc By Marc Jacobs for $ 658.  With the economy still not doing so well yet.  Why are things still so expensive.  I hope there will be some major sale for this year winter clothing.  Definitely need some extra cash, then again who doesn’t.

I got this at a random shop on Broadway

So remember i mention early i went out to the NYC to shop for the whole day and didn’t get home late at night.  Well, i finally have the camera to take the pictures of the clothes i bought.  I’m thinking about heading to the mall around my area to see if they have anything nice.

Read the rest of this entry »